Pain in Growth

Have you seen a clear solution to a problem, or worked very hard at something only for your ideas and efforts to be ignored? Perhaps you are in the middle of a situation now.

I’ve been a nurse for almost four decades. I know the feeling pretty well. At one job there was a turnover of two managers before I was hired, so that the people who both recommended me and hired me were gone. There was no set orientation process and I volunteered to help the new head of the unit to research best practices for a new process. I put in a lot of unpaid hours making phone calls, searching the internet and writing up a proposal. Not only did she ignore it, but a new hire of hers with far less experience and no degree became her “right hand man.” I have a kind demeanor yet I was treated very poorly. Because I wanted to help?

It still makes no sense to me, yet the hours were not in vain. I knew what the standards were and when we did not meet them and I was somehow marginalized–I knew it was not me. A friend of mine is going through a situation of her own and I can’t help but think that it is too easy to become bitter. If she does, the person who is affected most is she. So many things in life make no sense. My friend who has great experience and an altruistic desire to help goes unheard. Squelched. In situations like these, one could leave a job, but one could also continue to plug away, maintain dignity and focus on gratitude. Gratitude that they are making money at an awful time where others have lost jobs and businesses. Gratitude for health, or family. Gratitude that they are in a position to help others. Gratitude for faith.

Time has passed; that nurse manager left after a few years and the nurse she favored went on to another unit. They are both fine nurses and are helping people. I learned much from the experience and developed a thicker skin. Avoiding bitterness freed up my spirit to maintain a positive attitude for my patients and for my family. It wasn’t always easy and I wasn’t always perfect in the process, but the pain was not in vain. Through it we learn and grow.

People are often unreasonable, illogical and self-centered;
Forgive them anyway.

If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives;
Be kind anyway.

If you are successful, you will win some false friends and some true enemies;
Succeed anyway.

If you are honest and frank, people may cheat you;
Be honest and frank anyway.

What you spend years building, someone could destroy overnight;
Build anyway.

If you find serenity and happiness, they may be jealous;
Be happy anyway.

The good you do today, people will often forget tomorrow;
Do good anyway.

Give the world the best you have, and it may never be enough;
Give the world the best you’ve got anyway.

You see, in the final analysis, it is between you and your God;
It was never between you and them anyway.

Mother Teresa

Author:

Yes, Mom of ten plus. Ten of our own, host-Mom of foreign exchange students and au pairs, and other wonderful young men and women. The latter were the direct influence of our special needs daughter, Mary Pat, and they have blessed us in innumerable ways. Past prime is okay; so many life experiences cause one to reflect on things learned and cultivate an attitude of gratitude.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s